This little guy sure is trying out his independence these days! Everything is "my turn". Here's the thing...I'm all for him trying new things, learning new things, not giving up, being determined...all those valuable life skills that I definitely don't want to stifle.
But...
When it has to be MY turn....either we really do HAVE to leave the store, we need to get going and I have to buckle the seat belt, etc ...there are shrieks and screams to be heard!
Despite that I have experience with kids, despite that I have a degree in early childhood education....I'm at a loss! So far I've given him the 5 minute all the way to 1 minute warnings leading up to something happening, I've ignored the screaming (and discussed it later), Ive done the questioning of what led to the fit, I've done timeout....Do I just need to wait it out? Will this pass? I'm planning on sticking to my words, doing what I said I'd do, and being calm throughout. Suggestions, please!
(Why yes, I did document today's tantrum....thinking "Here's my blog post for today!")
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Happiest Toddler on the Block helped us.
ReplyDeleteI have had the most success making a really really huge deal when behavior is good, and rewarding, but not with candy, stickers and toys. Rewarding with my time, some special one on one thing. It still takes time though. Good luck
ReplyDeleteOur favorite parenting book is The Power of Positive Parenting. We still pull it out and look things up when we have issues with our children. Even the 22 year old one :)
ReplyDeleteI loved the Power of Positive Parenting, and I have a copy if you'd like it (we are seriously thinning out our book collection and this one is currently in the DI pile...). It really is a great book.
ReplyDeleteHaving said that, I think a certain amount of it is really just normal and you kind of just have to stick to your guns until it passes. It's hard to watch your sweet little angel turn into an irrational screaming banshee!!
Ha ha! Oh katie, I'm going through the same thing! I don't have the time or patience to read another book, so I just pray. :) I think you're doing great, and it's just something most toddlers go through. One thing I found that does help cache is if I let him know he's helping me by letting me do it sometimes. His complaint is usually " I help I help", so I let him climb in his seat and then praise him for helping while I buckle him up. But even then, there are times when that doesn't completely work. If you find the secret I'd love to know it. :)
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha. Oh these crazy toddler boys, we can relate over here, at least you don't have another child that is competing for attention, ha! I am sure it will pass, you just have to be patient and realize that some days are better than others, and acknodledge the good/positive things that happen with him.
ReplyDeleteGood luck! If you need a break, drive him to our house so T will have a buddy to play basketball with in the basement! :)
Yes. Wait it out. A lot of it is age. HOWEVER, I'm also a fan of ignoring or talking VERY calmly. If you lose it, he'll lose it more and worse the next time. And then just do whatever it is you need to do while ignoring him. He'll get over it. (you, however... ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd I read Sharon's copy of the Power of Positive Parenting and thought it was good.
Just be glad he is a boy and not a girl!!!! I cannot remember Carter's "tantrums", but Avery might just kill me:) Soooo much worse. Most times i just try to ignore it and count the hours til nap time or bedtime:) It will pass!!!! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteThank you all for comments!
ReplyDeleteBarb--I read Happiest Baby on the Block and was kinda just meh. But, I googled the gist of Happiest Toddler and liked what it said...so maybe I'll give it a look.
Sharon-- Would love to take it off your hands if you're sure it's going to the DI. I'll trade you for a Dr. Pepper?
I have noticed a few things about his behavior, and mine! ...and now that I think about it, I feel a blog post coming on....
My boys tantrums were much worse than Sage's. As with anything, I think it just depends on the kid. Sure, the book is yours! I'll bring it this afternoon and leave it in your box. Having seen how you teach, I don't know that any of it will be earth shatteringly new info to you, but I really love the way he presents it. He's just so calm and encouraging.
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