Tantrums...Part 2

Ok...I got a lot of good feedback about the tantrums business.
A few thoughts....

*In my classroom (and in life, too) I'm a big believer in natural consequences. Didn't do your homework? That's ok, you'll just need to use your recess time to do it. Didn't line up appropriately? That's ok, I have extra time to practice with you during recess. I have tried to keep with this with Will as much as possible. Sometimes, being that he's two, it just takes a long time to stick to it. I have to really stick to it...when it'd be A LOT easier to give in.

*Speaking of giving in, I sooooo don't want to raise THAT child. He needs and deserves consequences, procedures, rules, etc.

*Amid my google searches, I found something (was it from the summary of Happiest Toddler on the Block? I think so?) about echoing the toddler's feelings in words and tone. (Don't quote me exactly, but something along those lines.) This was an ah-ha moment for me...because I've noticed that we (RJ and I) do a lot of trying to distract and diffuse the situation. So when Will is about to launch into a tantrum, we're saying, "Will! Are you grumpy gus? Hey! Did you remember that we get fruit snacks when we get home?! That will be soooo fun!" ...ok, that was exaggerating, but you get the idea. Just think about that a moment. If you were totally mad, totally furious...and someone asked if you were being a "grumpy gus"....would that just MAKE YOU SOOOO MAD and want to hit them?! No wonder he's hitting us! ha! So, I've tried to do more, "Oh, you sound mad. I'll talk to you when you calm down." Then I carry on doing whatever and when he is mellow (as long as he's safe in the meantime), I say something like, "Oh good, you're calm now. You sounded mad." It seems to mellow us both out and help end the battle quickly. Of course, if there's a consequence that needs to happen, it does. Anyway...among that babble, did that make sense?

*I definitely think a large chunk of this phase is his age.

*A coworker mentioned today that I might have days with his toddler phase that are so hard, but that the teenage phase is also so hard, if not harder. I agree. At least with Will, I can mostly control the environment and keep him safe. Teenage years are SO HARD. There is so much out of anyone's control, so much going on during those years...the hormones, the social stuff, the friends, the family dynamics, school, jobs...etc. Being a teenager could really be a whole other post. I didn't mind my teenage years at the time, but man am I glad they are over. It's just such a hard time of life. I hope teenagers know that the hard times will pass, and life will be good!

*I've also tried to be less in a hurry. If we're going to the store, I've tried to take some time and have some fun with him. It's more just changing my frame of mind, because really, it's 4:00 and we have nowhere to be until bed at 8:00. We can take our time pointing out colors, shapes, letters. Bonus...I find when I do this, the rest of the night goes much smoother. He's had a chunk of undivided attention, we both enjoyed our time, and now he's ready and willing to listen and follow directions more.

*Um...I think that's all?

I'll be at Target

My "Daily Deal" text from Target:




YIKES.


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The Tantrums...oh, the Tantrums!

This little guy sure is trying out his independence these days! Everything is "my turn". Here's the thing...I'm all for him trying new things, learning new things, not giving up, being determined...all those valuable life skills that I definitely don't want to stifle.

But...

When it has to be MY turn....either we really do HAVE to leave the store, we need to get going and I have to buckle the seat belt, etc ...there are shrieks and screams to be heard!

Despite that I have experience with kids, despite that I have a degree in early childhood education....I'm at a loss! So far I've given him the 5 minute all the way to 1 minute warnings leading up to something happening, I've ignored the screaming (and discussed it later), Ive done the questioning of what led to the fit, I've done timeout....Do I just need to wait it out? Will this pass? I'm planning on sticking to my words, doing what I said I'd do, and being calm throughout. Suggestions, please!




(Why yes, I did document today's tantrum....thinking "Here's my blog post for today!")

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Coupon

I got a Famous Footwear coupon in the mail for $5 off a shoe purchase. For some reason I read the fine print on the back....




See near the bottom? Limit 21 pairs of shoes. 21?! Who buys 21 pairs of shoes at once...even if there's $5 off?


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"Bagel Store"

In college, I worked as a nanny for a wonderful family. Their son, Andrew, and I went to Einstein's Bagels often. He deemed it "The Bagel Store". I also worked at Einstein's in college...(and Rite-Aid, and at Cafe Sabor....)

I adored both (all, really) jobs. Einstein's was such a fun place to work-great people, an awesome boss, yummy food, and enough coffee to feed (start) my addiction. Those early Saturday and Sunday morning shifts sure came early after a fun night out...but all in all, I loved it there.

So, today, Will and I went to "The Bagel Store". It's really surreal for me to reminisce about working there and the fun of college, as I'm there with my own child nearly 10 years later!



The memories of dragging myself out of my bunk bed at the Chi Omega house to put on my khakis, Einstein's seasonal-themed tshirt (with the forever embedded everything bagel smell!), and visor...to drive to work and get started on my favorite vanilla hazelnut coffee. Memories of my friends coming in to visit about 4 hours later, at a normal college wake up time! Memories of taking the extra, to be thrown away, bagels home to the house to share.

Ah...the good old' days.



It's just so weird to me to think of mopping those same floors (loathed that part!), restocking the lettuce, refilling those same napkin dispensers....if I could have glimpsed into the future, thinking that I'd see myself as a wife, mom, teacher eating in that same corner....so strange.

The best part was when W held his bagel up to his eye and said, "Mama? See you!"

...or when he looked at the huge pictures on the wall. There's one with a bull rider, but instead of a bull, a giant bagel. Will couldn't figure it out and kept saying, "Sit? Sit? Bagel?" Except that "sit" had a "sh" sound in it...awkward! There I was, repeating, "Yeah, SIT. He's sitting on a bagel!"

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Wise Words

You know THAT friend on Facebook? The one who posts every detail of her life (yes, her...most are women)? "Eating delicious spaghetti!" "Walking down the stairs!" "Thirsty!" "Breathing"

Then there's the one who posts every dramatic detail of her drama....waaaaaaaaay too much information to keep it classy.

Yesterday, one of my friends posted this on FB:

"Instead of venting about your life with a status update, try writing a friend saying you need a good ear. You'll not only feel better, but you'll strengthen the bond between you, making your life richer."

I think she borrowed it from a friend...anyway, regardless of who wrote it, wise words! I'm sure grateful that I have friends I can chat with for hours....

March Goal

On to a new month...finnnalllly! February seemed so long, and it wasn't just that extra day. I have major winter blues this year...but that's another post.

My month o' water (Feb goal) went fairly well. Here comes March! I like March....aside from it being my birthday month (yay!), it seems to signal the beginning of spring to me...despite today's weather...and I'm soooo ready for some sunshine.

March Goal:
I will blog every day. It may be short, may be long...but a post a day!


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